sigerson: (brett)


anatomical gift

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I've been very quiet lately...some of it is not wanting to post unless I have a real essay to show off, and some of it is just inertia. Yesterday, however, my friend [ profile] bezique posted a quick note saying that he's glad to be alive--specifically, because a dump truck barrelled into the car that he and Shoshe and her parents were occupying.

They're all okay; broken sternums and horrific scares and all, they're all okay.

For me, it was a terrible reminder of how fragile life can be; how great the odds are against us, and how lucky I am that so many of my friends are alive and healthy. As saccharine as it can feel to be thinking in these sort of Hallmark terms, they're valid and real, and if they're not worth posting to LJ, nothing is.

So for you who have brought me to your homes, who have reached to me when I was empty, who have made me laugh, who have challenged me to think, who have inspired me, who have shared tea and contemplation or coffee and giggles, who have seen me yesterday or not for years:

Be well, and be healthy, and know that I'm grateful for you. And stay away from dump trucks.
sigerson: (Default)

I don't think it's the end of the world. I'm not moving to Canada. I'm not convinced that we're doooooooomed. And I'm extremely happy for the gains that did happen, and that things could have been far worse.

I'm not any less angry or upset, either. I've been doing the hoping-for-the-best thing for so long that I want a day of depression and gloom to break down in; then I can go back to putting one stone atop another, one good deed, one person helped, one victory won. But today feels pretty damned bad, regardless of the limitless potential we still have, the power in change and anger, the things we've accomplished and the things we can accomplish.

In spite of all that, today still feels damned bad. And I do the (comparatively) Happy Shiny Optimist thing a lot, so I don't think I'm being irrational by taking a day to bellow.

This anger is real. This sorrow is real--even if Kerry ultimately wins. Today, they're what I can feel.

Tomorrow I will put them aside, shrink them down, and use them to make things different.
sigerson: (Default)
I'm infuriated and wounded and depressed and angry.
I'm trying to channel that into something productive. It's not working yet. I'm so angry and so very sad.

Every single gay marriage ban was passed. Every fucking one. The recount makes me nervous and desperate, but this just makes me...

...Time for some righteous anger. The good kind.

In other news, I got the job.
sigerson: (Default)
Hyperbole, exhaustion, crisis. It's a great big essay.
It's behind this cut tag. )


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April 2017

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